Whatever Tool You Need

I do a tarot reading for myself every day and it has been one of the most helpful tools in my arsenal... and I didn't admit it to anyone for a while. When I felt a little more comfortable, I shared this with the people I thought might be able to understand. Not only did they understand, they wanted me to do my readings with them too... and they also loved them.

About a year ago now I even dabbled with starting to offer readings to people and built a whole infrastructure for a business... and then abandoned it. I could hear the judgey voices in my head that stopped me from even telling anyone. Things like, "you don't really believe in that, do you?" or "wow I used to think you were reasonable, but now I am not too sure."

And Then I Tried Again

Just a few days ago I had a realization I could eliminate one of my other barriers to this business, building my own way of doing them that could match my energy fluctuations. I created a system where I could do readings asynchronously - Practical Tarot, my async tarot reading practice I built to work with my energy - has found a new life with me. But, when it came to pull the trigger and post about it... I hesitated again. Those voices just as loud, just as insistent on the shame.

It hit me then - if I am having a hard time talking about it, I bet the people who could benefit from it are going to have a hard time with the embarrassment of actually doing it. Somehow thinking of it through that lens made me say no, this is really helping me, I've gotten universally positive feedback from the people I was doing it with, I am not going to let this shame keep me quiet.

If a tool isn't harmful to yourself and others, if it genuinely is helping you, if it is making a positive impact on your life, why are we keeping it under the surface? Now for some people, the step of saying there is something that needs to be fixed or is wrong may be too big of a first step. But beyond that... why?

It's Not Just Tarot

I get that Tarot may be an extreme form of this for some of you. But Sara helped me realize something the other day - and honestly, it's kind of the whole thesis of No Shame in Our Game - there are other variations of this when it comes to mental health. It's only been very recent that things like therapy and medication have become less shameful (this song from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend will always come to mind about this for me). I'm not ashamed to tell you that I've said to my psychiatrist regularly that the sertraline I've been on for the past 7-8 years is the MVP in my life.

You don't have to write a newsletter to everyone in your life when you find a tool that works for you, but you don't have to feel ashamed about it. If crocheting calms you and makes you feel centered, who cares if you're a mafia man second in command and it makes you seem less tough - embrace that granny square pillow you made, don't hide it (this may or may not be an exact example from a book I am currently listening to).

This is a Lacey thing, not a Practical Hug pivot. I'm not going to be talking about Practical Tarot every week - but that doesn't mean I shouldn't talk about it at all. If it's the right tool for someone reading this, fantastic. That's not really why I'm telling you, though.

Let A Little Light In

As Sara continues to say, shame grows in the dark. If something is helping you, let a little light in on it. I'm letting a little light in on how I use tarot as a thinking tool - that it helps me get out of my anxious thoughts and make connections that my brain wouldn't let me do without it. I'm not a mystic or predicting the future (if that's you or what you believe in, this is no shade, just being clear about my lane). If I can help someone else with that, awesome.

So I am asking you, what's the thing YOU keep dismissing because someone might judge it? Is there something you love that makes your world a bit better and easier that you're keeping shut in the dark because of that shame? I hope you let a little light in. You don't have to do it alone - that's kind of why we're all here.